smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
