his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize
