How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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