I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
