So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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