i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
This is classic penis vs brain.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
