You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
