It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize