idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
