I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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