There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
