Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I just threw up on my dentist
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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