hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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