I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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