Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize