I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
