dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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