dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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