its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
