Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
