I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
