Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
