i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
