she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Randomize