Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize