i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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