Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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