who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Randomize
