I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
then he tried to convert me to islam
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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