I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize