Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
