worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize