And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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