It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
