i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize