I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
