my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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