Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
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