I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
