was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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