normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
