Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I have aggressive nipples.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
