yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize