I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
