____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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