i jhust puked up my retainher.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
You can't just leave with hair like that
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
