Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
