at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize