Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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