My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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